Unverified WHAT? Voracity YEAH

Well... it was a disappointing end but given the expectations at the beginning of the year -- picked fourth in the conference, some concern over extending the tournament streak -- the results -- CCHA double, GLI title, Frozen Four -- are outstanding. Probably the only Michigan revenue sport to exceed expectations since... uh, 2006 football. Never mind.

Highlights from the year that was:



The Hoover Street Rag says next year in DC, and got even more jerseys than we did.

Now that's a lot of trouble. I wonder what a Michigan list the equivalent of this soaring, majestic dossier of Penn State malfeasance would look like? A brief, representative snippet:

17. Tony Johnson - Arrest, DUI - Guilty
18. Richard Cheek - Arrest, Stolen Credit Card - Guilty
19. Yaacov Yisreal - DUI, - Guilty
20. Dan Drogan - DUI Leaving Accident, - Guilty
21. Dethrell Garcia - DUI, - Guilty
22. Scott Paxson - Criminal Mischief, Summary Charge - Guilty
23. E.Z. Smith - Drunk in public - Summary Charge - Guilty
24. R.J. Luke - Arrest Assault, - Acquitted
25. Damone Jones - Unknown Charges - Dismissed From School
26. Mike Sothern - Terroristic Disorderly Criminal Mischief - Guilty
27. Mike Sothern - Criminal Mischief Expelled - Guilty

"Terroristic Disorderly Criminal Mischief" is the best charge ever. The list, which dates back to 1999 or thereabouts, comprises 57 separate incidents including JoePa's road rage and generally paints the picture of a team that no longer fears or respects their coach, possibly because he works from home. And is one billion. And tries to eat their brains.

While I don't think Michigan could match Penn State's achievement in this category, if you took just the last few years the schools would be pretty close: Sears, Arrington, Richards, Butler, Germany and so forth and so on. Moral of the story: once you lose your "I'm gonna kill you" fastball, discipline and performance starts slipping as your guys start getting frisky. Thus Penn State -- .500 in the Big Ten over the past eight years -- and Michigan's uneven performance in the last years of the Carr era. Is it a coincidence that West Virginia started racking up Fulmer Cup points in earnest as soon as mean ol' Rich Rodriguez left and nice ol' Bill Stewart was promoted from teaching European History to tenth graders?

Mean is good.

Seriously? Is this "OMG Tressel" tiff still "going on"? Rodriguez was asked (yet again) about whether he was a Rumpelstiltskin-style* child kidnapping fetish after Jim Tressel made a joke that probably wasn't directed at Rodriguez at all. A recap:



What would you describe this as? I would go with "patient explanation to child with a tape recorder." The Free Press went with:

Rich Rodriguez fires back after Jim Tressel's jab at his recruiting tactics

The thing they cited first as "firing back":

“If not being a gentleman is recruiting guys until the end, until signing day, particularly after all visits — guilty as charged."

Can you fire back by agreeing with someone?

Of course, someone scurried off to the next Tressel press conference with Rodriguez's stunning riposte and asked for a riposte riposte:

Asked if he had a beef with Rodriguez, Tressel said, "I've known Rich for a long time; no beefs at all. He'll do a good job. I've said that all along."

This is exactly why I never begrudged Carr his churlish relationship with the media. What a waste of time.

I was flicking through the spring practice pictures on the Free Press' website when I hit this one...

...and thought to myself "I wonder if his questions were any less substantive than those of the professionals?"

Probably not. I bet Derek Tinkle's work is in need of some copyediting but no more or less informative than your average newspaper piece.

This might also be the place to relate that when Michigan was in Denver preparing for their semifinal against Notre Dame, they made it clear Billy Sauer didn't really want to talk about the North Dakota game last year. The first question (from a knob at the Denver Post) was basically "how do you feel about being such a goddamn failure in the North Dakota game last year?"

It's one thing to ask a "tough question" when there is the possibility of an enlightening response or someone has undertaken ethically questionable activities. Tough questions in the context of the Ann Arbor News' investigation into independent study and the like are fine. (That the Ann Arbor news passed on the opportunity to ask those questions because they didn't want an email interview is another matter entirely.) A "tough question" to a 20-year-old kid when the answer to that question is going to be the standard athlete cliche boilerplate about taking it one game at at time is just being a dick.

But journalism has this weird machismo thing going on where that's prized: see any anti-blogging screed that claims the basement-dwellers inferior because they don't say rude things directly to the players themselves. I've always found it interesting that said screeds contain the implication that bloggers are wantonly negative because they don't have to face repercussions. Newspapers, meanwhile, are full of people who are wantonly negative because they like being wantonly negative even in the face of social approbation.

Which group sounds more maladjusted?

*(apparently the Firefox dictionary has "Rumpelstiltskin" in it, which... like -- gnome (yes) griffin (yes) hippogriff (no) sphinx (yes) mindflayer (no) gorgon (yes) Perseus (yes) Icarus (yes) -- is apparently only the tip of a nerd iceberg. It figures: open source.)

Reverse. Of course, it's not all bad. See this informative piece on NCAA, Big Ten and Michigan drug testing regimes by Mark Snyder that explains just how Manningham could play despite testing positive for weed. Operative area:

As for punishment, a Michigan athlete who fails a first test will be referred for counseling and attend an assessment with the athletic department doctor. If the athlete does not participate in the counseling, "additional disciplinary action will be taken by the athletic director and/or head coach and may include, but not be limited to, suspension from practice/games," according to the policy.

A second positive test -- at least 90 days later -- results in suspension from competition for 10% of the maximum allowable contests in the traditional season and must be served immediately. The coach may enhance the penalty.

Manningham was suspended for the Eastern game this year but no others. Question: I recall Arrington being suspended for large chunks of his career, and he was one of the three guys -- Eugene Germany and Carson Butler the others -- in serious trouble after the Rose Bowl for an incident widely rumored to be getting crunk in the hotel days before the game (WHAT?). I bet one of his one-off suspensions was for a second positive test and the Rose Bowl incident was his third; Butler also got a one-off suspension during his redshirt freshman year, IIRC. Both nearly got the boot.

Speaking of weed, man.

1) At Copper Mountain on Saturday they were having some sort of season-closing music fest. When I got off the hill, George Clinton was playing and man... freaky, man.

2) Ohio State's having their own problems with the marijuana:

That 2008 Buckeye defense we’ve all been daydreaming about just took a bit of a hit. The rumors from earlier in the day proved to be correct and Donald Washington, Jamario O’Neal and Eugene Clifford are in a bit of trouble.

Eleven Warriors says the message-board buzz is that Eugene Clifford is gonzo -- hello, Cincinatti -- and Washington may follow him out the door, while O'Neal is in trouble but safe. That's probably in inverse order from what Buckeye fans would like (other than "no pot issues at all"), as Jamario "Toast" O'Neal is a backup as a senior and has been a bust whereas Washington is a useful nickelback and Clifford was the highest rated recruit in OSU's 2007 class.

3) Ladies and gentlemen... Ohio State fans!



What are the chances this guy didn't smoke a bowl ten seconds before this? Zero. What are the chances this guy really likes Chappelle's Show for all the reasons that drove Dave Chappelle crazy? 100%.

Talkin'



Etc: Stuff Golden Domed People like from MNB... MNB's wife is a Domer so this one's authentic; some sort of Fan Day will happen in August; we're slow but smart; Russ Levine drops a Tacopants reference in this FO article; MVictors digs up a bit of M history on Will Johnson's Meyer Morton award; Ekpe do you not know the pathways of my heart?

Unverified Voracity Has Daddy Issues

Pryor. It's been quiet on the Pryor front of late, mostly because everyone's given up and assumes he's headed to OSU. A Mike Farrell story provides a glimmer of optimism in the form of a potential visit...

"I'd like my mom to see both places and Penn State," he said. "So we're talking about a day trip to both Ohio State and Michigan, and she'd come along with me on my Penn State trip."

...but not much of one. Pryor says he'll decide by April 1st.

I get this question a lot: "when does Pryor have to sign by?" The answer is "never." If Pryor is going to sign a LOI, he has to do it by the end of the month, but the LOI doesn't actually do anything for the player. If Pryor doesn't sign he can still show up on a college campus this fall and get an athletic scholarship.

In other Pryor news: weird guys make figurines, and there's no way to say it that doesn't sound like sour grapes, but... uh... I don't know if Pryor's much of a warrior-poet. You've probably seen the Bleacher Report thing about that near-riot at a basketball game, which was at least partially substantiated by a newspaper columnist:

That’s when a Jeannette assistant exited the Jayhawks’ locker and complained about the conduct of the South Fayette students. That’s something he had a right to do.

One officer, however, did not appreciate the direction of the conversation. He was present when Pryor accosted the South Fayette fans.

“You’re lucky we didn’t take your kid (Pryor) in,” the officer said. “He threatened to go into the crowd.”

A Penn State friend mentioned that there was a pretty horrifying account of Pryor's behavior posted on one of the PSU premium boards by someone who was at the game, and sent it along. It's pretty convincing, especially because at the time Penn State fans were hopeful Pryor would pick them.

Then there's this Plain-Dealer piece Run Up The Score noted:

Sharon, Pa. — Day 28 since the Day of No Decision. Subject No. 1 — Pryor, Terrelle — seems aloof Wednesday night, at times disinterested. He applies himself only when necessary — and when a fast-break dunk appears possible.

“He plays as well as he needs to play,” says his basketball coach at Jeannette High School, Jim Nesser. “I don’t know if that sounds good, but if he needs to take it to another level, he can do that.”

And then, like, uh...

“I’m a Pryor,” he says. “My dad used to hit me when I lost at anything, at fights, anything. I mean, your dad is supposed to make you a man, right? That’s what he did.”

Not that this last quote reflects poorly on Pryor himself. It's just weird.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh... Iowa says CYA to a couple of the infamous Facebook guys, and others are pointedly not on the roster. It looks unlikely that any of the guys we've all seen 1) displaying lots of money, 2) putting lots of money on their head, or 3) eating lots of money will ever see the field at Iowa again. BHGP is, of course, crushed:



In other suspension-tastic news, Penn State tight end Andrew Quarless is probably hanging by a thread after a DUI charge, his second alcohol related run-in with the law in a year, and Indiana's Kellen Lewis has violated some team rules.

BONUS speculation on the Quarless incident can be found over at Black Shoe Diaries:

An insider on a message board has just indicated there is more to this story which will come out in time. And it's not good. He didn't give details so don't ask me what it is.

Begin rampant speculation now.

This might have something to do with the car Quarless was pulled over in: a white BMW.

Updated. Made a couple fixes to the depth chart by class: I miscounted the OL (there are 15, not 14) and erroneously asserted that Troy Woolfolk redshirted last year. He did not. Other assertion made that I believe is incorrect: Moosman, Zirbel, and Stewart are in their final years of eligibility. IIRC, all redshirted. Other assertion made that I can't confirm: Marell Evans didn't redshirt. Which would be, like, WTF.

Etc.: UMHoops interviews Stuart Douglass; Rodriguez "lectured".

Andy Moeller Refuses To Breathe

Case #:

07W139528

Case Type:

OI

Case Status:

PEND

MOELLER/ANDREW/G                TCN:                 
                               OFFENSE DATE: 12/08/07  740 PM

....

COUNT  1 C/M/F: C 1320          ORD#10:1A/257.625A(2)        

PBT REFUSAL IN NON-CMV, 21 AND OVER                                             

(Source: search for "Moeller" here.) At 7:40 PM on Saturday, Michigan offensive line coach Andy Moeller got pulled over for DUI. He refused a breathalyzer test.

No One Wants To See Your Wang, Kid

Come on, you've got to be kidding me:

Two University of Michigan football players are facing trial next month, one of them for allegedly exposing himself to a female acquaintance inside Michigan Stadium.

Wide receiver LaTerryal Savoy was arraigned Wednesday on one count of indecent exposure, a misdemeanor that carries a maximum penalty of one year in jail and/or a $1,000 fine. His pretrial hearing was held today in Ann Arbor's 15th District Court, where a trial date was set for Sept. 21.

I... just keep your pants on. Meanwhile, we have a DUI:

Another player, linebacker Obi Ezeh, is charged with operating a vehicle while intoxicated, a misdemeanor with a maximum penalty 93 days in jail and/or a $500 fine and/or 360 hours of community service.

Savoy, a redshirt sophomore, is at best the fourth wide receiver depending on how well the freshmen play, but Ezeh had been impressing many after a freshman year when he redshirted and had been moved to middle linebacker to compete for the starting job. Assuming Savoy hasn't made a Larry Harrison-esque habit of displaying his package, both are likely to receiver minor suspensions. The main on-field effect: Ezeh's chances of overtaking Johnny Thompson take a hit.

(HT: EDSBS.)

Unverified Voracity Says Goodbye Omaha

Postmortem. Game two against Oregon State, for anyone perusing the carnage below, was just as frustrating as game one but in the exact opposite way. As a result, Michigan's baseball season is over. But if you can get past the frustration of watching the flurry of walks, wild pitches, balks that put the season to the sword, the baseball team still appears to be on the upswing.

Most of the team returns next year. Gone are centerfielder Eric Rose, the #9 hitter, rightfielder Brad Roblin, and #3-4 starter Andrew Hess. Juniors Nate Recknagel, Doug Pickens, and Derek Van Buskirk are probably going to return. Only Pickens was drafted, and that was in the 50th round. Without question they'll be the favorites in the Big Ten and should make their fourth consecutive NCAA tournament. Rich Maloney, pictured at right with the late Faz of Hello Faz Pizza for some reason (ask the Daily), has recruiting and onfield momentum, an $11 million stadium renovation on the verge of completion, and his top players returning. Onward and upward. Hopefully someday in the near future we can say hello to Omaha.

Back and probably not gone. Adrian Arrington's, um, "rehabilitation" assignment, as noted on the sidebar a few days ago, has been completed and Arrington has returned to the team. He's definitely on double secret probation now -- any extracurricular mention of him in the paper more nefarious than a picture of him huggling puppies means he's gone-gone -- but that's better than the triple secret, stairs-running probation he's been on for the past few months. So bully for all that. Odd that the one guy of the three -- Arrington, Eugene Germany, and Carson Butler -- Carr mumbled into oblivion before spring practice everyone assumed was gonzo is the one guy who made it back to the field. Knock on wood. He sounds like he's learned his lesson:

"I just put myself in bad situations sometimes,'' the receiver said. "I don't know why. Now, I've got to deal with it. My head is in a whole different place right now, going through this. I let a lot of people down. I just have a whole different mind-set right now. I'm packing it in a lot earlier these days."

One thing: if you find a guy named "AAirlines16" on whatever the PS3 equivalent of XBox Live is...

"I just hang out and play some PS3 instead of going out.''

...for God's sake, let him win.

Also on the wide receiver suspension tip: a couple days ago Rob Parker hinted that Mario Manningham was in serious trouble and could miss the season(!!!) on the TV. I can neither confirm nor deny this, having received no inside info on the matter, but immediately after Parker made his assertion, the program had their annual Carr's Wash for Kids charity event and this was the only piece of information dropped on Manningham:

Carr said receiver Mario Manningham's knee "is in excellent shape," but he needs to improve his "football shape."

Given Carr's history of grumbling about pages and such, it's doubtful he's aware of any issues that would keep him from the field. Chances are Parker is way overreacting to some third hand info about that traffic stop a month ago; given his track record with his insider info I don't think anyone should be concerned. You can insert the standard muttering about the media's standard muttering about the trustworthiness of "internet rumors" when they throw out all kinds of unconfirmed, plain wrong stuff every day of the year. Parker's continued employment should tell you all you need to know about how dedicated the local gatekeepers are to having solid information behind the stuff they throw out: not at all.

(Also there is this:

Carr also confirmed that Carlos Brown is comfortable staying in the program at running back and everyone who missed spring practice with an injury should be ready for fall camp.

I am still jumpy about his return.)

On campus! I was flipping through the pictures from the car wash and ran across this one:


Sam McGuffie on an unofficial visit? You make the call. (Obligatory McGuffie youtube link.)

Also there is this one in which Ryan Mallett looks like an extra from Top Gun with the callsign "Stork":

It's always been hard for me to approach a big road game without "Highway to the Danger Zone" running through my head over and over again*. This will not help matters.

*(You're probably asking "what?" at the moment. Long story short: I was seven, I was living in Denver, the Broncos were in the 1987 AFC Championship game against the Browns, they were traveling to Cleveland, and for some reason one of the enduring memories of my childhood is the local news station closing the week with a highlight montage set to the (in?)famous Kenny Loggins song. Two days and one iconic Drive later, the Broncos were going to the Super Bowl to lose it (and two more), thus establishing both the song and the idea that reaching the ultimate reward only brings you pain -- something Michigan is working on with gusto -- in my head for all time.

We're gonna take it... RIGHT IN TOOOOOOO...

THE DANGER ZONE!)

Also also, this one...

... made me think Jim Tressel had infiltrated us and was sabotaging Shawn Crable with hydrochloric acid until I realized it was Steve Szabo. I don't think he should walk around campus in sunglasses unless he wants to get tackled and locked in a basement until November.

Also also also, I think Johnny Sears wants to be Andre 3000 a little bit.

Who can blame him?

Etc.: Oregon and ND are both at 3:30; Mark Snyder draws a Griese-Arrington parallel; Carty on the Mallett hubbub; Downtown Detroit is not the best place to sell OSU apparel.

Hurray Best More Offseason Forever

More trouble:

Two University of Michigan football players reportedly were in a car that allegedly contained drugs when it was stopped by police in Monroe County. No one was arrested and the Michigan State Police are waiting for lab results before any charges are filed. ...

Sources said a small amount of marijuana and tablets of Vicodin, a painkiller, were found in the car. A passenger in the car apparently told police at the scene that he had a legal prescription for the Vicodin, but it was not in his possession. Two other people in the car had the marijuana, according to sources.

No names have been released by the police officers in question. However, I got a tip from a reader when this happened a few days ago. I don't wish to sully anyone's name unnecessarily (nor does the Monroe News: check the reportedly-allegedly double burst of libel protection in the lead), but since this reader had the information on this the day of the incident I'm confident that he's right. So...

One of the guys in the car was Mario Manningham.


Okay. Okay. Okay. This is probably a pot bust and a first offense. He could even be the legal Vicodin guy -- he did have some surgery in the offseason. There's no way he gets in serious trouble for this if he's even in trouble. Maybe a slap on the wrist against Appalachian State, but nothing big. (Please?)

(Sidenote: A friend and I tried on our journalism hats and attempted to confirm this with the circuit court in question but since they haven't been charged with anything pending the results of the drug test they didn't have anything. My IRL information-gathering skills leave something to be desired.)

The Handicapped, The Egomaniacal, and Me

There's a section on John Pollack. It has swearing because by God people like John Pollack are why swearing was invented.

I am not a journalist! That's the point of this enterprise. But of late I have been pondering doing some kind of journalism-esque things. So when news came down of the Paralyzed Veterans of America suing the University over the renovations proposed I gave one of the law-talking guys a call. Because of IANAJTTP, this will not be an impartial news article; there would be no point with Official Journalists covering it much better and much quicker than I could. Witness this AP article heavily quoting Richard Bernstein, who happens to be the law-talking guy I spoke to. My conversation with the guy ran along the same lines. Bernstein to Official Journalist:

"It's extremely disappointing that it had to come to this," said Richard Bernstein, the attorney representing the plaintiffs.

Bernstein to me (note that all quotes were hastily transcribed and may not be exact. I've tried to hew as closely to his words as I could):

"When you file a federal lawsuit it's always a last resort."

Official Journalist:

"Notre Dame has 17 wheelchair-accessible seating locations throughout the stadium," Bernstein said, who also is an adjunct political science professor at Michigan. "We have two."

Me:

“Notre Dame Stadium is a carbon copy of the Michigan stadium and is ADA compliant. They have 17 locations that are wheelchair compliant.”

(He also mentioned he was a professor twice.)

Official Journalist:

Bernstein, who is blind and has taken the case pro bono, said the lawsuit is more far-reaching than simply providing better wheelchair access during Michigan football games and commencement exercises. He said a federal court ruling in favor of the university could have a "devastating impact on the ADA" because it would open the door for other developers looking to sidestep ADA provisions.

He said the court must draw a distinct line between "repair" and "alteration" projects, since the latter compels developers and property owners to comply with ADA guidelines. Left undefined, he said, disabled individuals will find it more difficult to use public venues, such as movie theaters, shopping malls and public transportation.

"Wheelchair users will lose access across the board, and will find it more difficult to be part of the community," Bernstein said.

Me:

“The reason we had to file was because what this entire case comes down to is the concept of alteration versus repair.”

“This isn't a critical issue because it's Michigan football. If Michigan establishes this precedent about doing renovation over a series of years, you'll see shopping centers, airports, any public venue, will follow what Michigan is doing, scattering their renovations over a long period of time.”

Official Journalist:

He said Michigan's ongoing construction project, dubbed a "renovation" on its Web site, is "offensive." ... "We're not asking for really good seats. We're asking for equal access. It's about inclusion. It's about civil rights."

Me:

"This is a major civil rights issue; this is infuriating to me.”

I am fairly heartened that it seems the Official Journalist could do no better when it came to getting something that didn't seem relentlessly practiced out of Bernstein than I did; at first I thought I was a hopeless n00b. Turns out we're all n00bs in the face of a lawyer.

The Daily has some of the same quotes but did a better job getting hard numbers than either myself or the AP:

Stadium-wide compliance would include making 1 percent of all seating handicap accessible and offering a variety of seating locations and ticket prices for disabled visitors. For the officially 107,501-seat stadium, that means there must be at least 1,000 handicap accessible seats.

...

The MPVA wants the renovations to follow the example of those at the University of Notre Dame. After recent renovations, Notre Dame Stadium provides more than 400 wheelchair-accessible seats in 17 different locations.

"If you look at Notre Dame and the University of Michigan, their stadiums were built by the same architect in the same era. All we're asking is U of M do what Notre Dame did," Bernstein said.

Isn't this the most important thing? What compliance is, what the current situation is, what the hard numbers are on the comparable Bernstein uses? How can every other article ignore it? Good job, Daily! Do you still have people who think "This Postmodern World" is a good title for a column? And can we deport them?

There are some things I managed to get in edgewise that didn't get reported in the papers:

• Our good and dear friend John Pollack's involvement was discussed. Bernstein managed to convince me that Pollack was not the motive force behind the lawsuit; it would be going on without his misguided attempts to "save" Michigan Stadium. However:

  “When he read in the papers that we were moving forward on this, he called me. He's been helpful. He gave us some details on Notre Dame Stadium's accessibility."

  Pollack jumped on board, seeing any avenue to shut down the renovations no matter how irrelevant to his cause.
• I'm not sure if Bernstein was confused on this point, but I was surprised at this assertion and pressed him to clarify it a couple times: even if the University decided to throw away the renovation plans and do nothing, they would be pressing forward with the lawsuit. They contend the ongoing replacement of Michigan Stadium benches and concrete already constitutes an ADA-triggering alteration.

This is where the opinion starts to come in, so full disclosure: I am in favor of these renovations and think John Pollack is a delusional idiot who believes he knows what's best for all Michigan fans. I'm striving to be fair to Bernstein and his paralyzed veterans and not misrepresent anything they've said or claimed, but I make no attempt to be "objective" in the traditional journalism sense. (IANAJTTP.) That sort of objectivity gets you articles that make no attempt to evaluate the claims laid out by the various sides, which is deeply annoying to me. Here we evaluate.

Anyway. This was my first experience talking to a lawyer trying to do PR and it was... interesting. Idiotically, I hadn't gotten the very relevant and very basic info on the university's renovation site about the ADA:

Q: Will the renovations address ADA accessibility?

Yes, the University will significantly increase the number and location of accessible seating for fans with impaired mobility. The new design adds an additional 72 accessible seats plus companion seats on the west side of the stadium. These seats will be covered and accessible through a new elevator. The east side of the stadium, the new design adds an additional 24 accessible outdoor club seats plus companion seats and 14 accessible inside club seats. In addition, there will be one accessible seat in every one of the suites. The total number of accessible seats will increase and the choice for location of accessible seating will now include both end zones and sideline seating.

Leaving out the accessible seats in the suites, the renovation calls for a total addition of 110 accessible seats to the already existing 100 in the endzones (though I'm not sure that all 100 of those seats can functionally be used by handicapped people; I think there's just a handicap-accessible area that holds a total of 100 people, including companions.) Note that each of the proposed 110 additional seats comes with a companion seat and that the distribution of the seats would be throughout the stadium. Also note that the total seating, even including the luxury box seats, is around 280, way below the mendoza line.

The veterans took an alternate proposal to the regents late last year; Bernstein made a big deal about regents Cathy White and Larry Deitch concurring with the vets and making a motion and a second to reject the renovations based upon it.

"There was a motion and a second, and they voted it down 6-2."

The implication was that because someone had heeded them and another regent agreed that the others were callous for not following a long. I don't get that, especially because what he failed to mention is that White and Deitch were two of the three regents who consistently voted against the renovations for any and all available reasons. How much of their concern was real and how much was pretext?

So how am I supposed to reconcile that information with this quote from Bernstein?

"The university has been totally unresponsive."

I dunno. I kind of think this is an exaggeration, but how am I to know? I don't think Bernstein was being entirely honest with me. Not that he was being dishonest. He was being lawyery. It was kind of creepy.

This was the most bothersome thing, the grand microcosm:

"What is it they're fighting for?"

That was Bernstein's big finish. I really dislike the implications there: plaintiffs Fight For Justice against "totally unresponsive" faceless athletic department. By the time we were done, I had gotten a couple questions in edgewise, heard a lot of things over and over again, and felt vaguely like I had just been witness to a particularly fast-pitched political speech. The University is fighting for... me. They want to do right by the handicapped guys but they also have constraints here. Assuming that they're screwing over handicapped guys just because there aren't any Indonesians around they can force to make licensed apparel is kind of dishonest. This is a really hard process and at the very least Michigan is vastly improving the situation.

The whole thing seems shoddy to me. I don't know if Robert Bernstein is related to Sam Bernstein, but I do know that he works for Sam Bernstein's firm... you know, 1-800-CALL-SAM. The guy who can get results for you after your car accident. And it shows. Not contend with rounding up some wheelchair-bound disability rights advocates, these guys go right for the paralyzed veterans. They're veterans, dammit! Why don't you let them in to your stadium? Do you hate America?

But... they kind of have a point. IA(obviously)NAL, but if Michigan is trying to claim that they don't need to be fully ADA compliant because what they plan to do to the stadium doesn't constitute an alteration, well, that's pretty weaselly. I'm not totally insensitive to this issue. I have a friend who teeters in and out of the stadium on crutches every week. My grandfather (who was an usher at Ferry Field(!) and is the primary reason that I am often suffered to sit at the 40 yard line, since our tickets have been in the family since the 50s) spent his final Michigan games watching from the crappy seats in the endzone. I don't know what's enough seating and don't have anywhere near enough information to pick a winner, but I can say that this is a real lawsuit and a real concern as opposed to that hippie crap going on at Cal and that some of the intemperate comments in the aftermath of the lawsuit's filing were out of line (even if I shared that opinion for a moment or an hour).

One final note: This is the point on Bullshit where Penn drops the jokes and very seriously addresses the camera: John Pollack is a cynical, manipulative asshole who will stop at nothing for his luxury box hissyfit to conclude successfully. I'm dead serious about this. This isn't "Stewart Mandel is retarded" or "CFN is retarded" or "Matt Hayes is a synonym for penis." Though I get angry when media professionals run around saying very stupid things, it's a shallow anger that I mostly mine for humor. If I ran into any of these people I wouldn't regard them with anything other than condescension. I'm not actually angry at them. This is different. John Pollack has no use for what the truth is. In his mind, the ends always justify the means:

"This is being driven by an obsession with luxury boxes," he said. "The University is effectively arguing that it is more important to provide seating for 1,500 people in luxury boxes than it is to provide seating for people with disabilities as required by law."

Ridiculous. Insulting. And a paranoid fantasy caused by his unsupported belief that "the University is trying to subsidize the loss in revenue that would be caused by luxury boxes by increasing regular bleacher seating and overlooking the interests of disabled people." Yes, of course. Bill Martin's putting in luxury boxes just like all those other pro and college teams that just love losing money. Paralyzed veterans are a way for Pollack to get what he wants, and the truth is only something for him to spin into something unrecognizable to stoke outrage. The only outrage in this complicated issue is Pollack and his behavior.

And you know the kicker? Motherfucker went to Stanford. Go screw up your alma mater, asshole. (Motherfucker also spent 30 years building a boat out of wine corks and he has the gall to criticize someone else for ill-advised construction?)

No, wait. This is the kicker. The kicker of kickers. This is what John Pollack thinks of himself and his quest to prevent luxury boxes at Michigan Stadium.

In 1989, the image of one man standing in front. Can one man, willing to take a stand, make a difference? Can one person stop the powers that be dead in their tracks?

Remember Tiananmen Square?

Profiles of that kind of courage seem hard to find these days but, if you are willing to look then you will indeed find, examples of that kind of heroism.

I swear to God I'm not making this up. There is an enormous profile/interview of this prick up at "DanaRoc.com" -- Dana Roc apparently "creates, develops and produces programs that empower people to be productive, powerful, successful and happy" -- about this "Save The Big House" campaign and it starts off by directly comparing John Pollack to the kid in front of the tank in Tianamen Square. Seriously:

An extraordinarily courageous young man captured the attention of the entire world in June of 1989, when he single handedly stopped the advance of a tank column by standing in its way...

JP reminds us all again of the power of one man willing to take a stand.

One person cheering doesn't make a whole lot of noise but, you get 100,000 people cheering and suddenly you've got a roar! -- John Pollack

This is the face of luxury box opposition. Even if he didn't write this enormously offensive blurb, by God, he's read it and didn't immediately demand its removal. I'm speechless. I mean, what can you say?

Germany, Richards, Butler Officially Gone

Free Press:

Michigan coach Lloyd Carr announced today that three players — tight end Carson Butler, cornerback Chris Richards and defensive end Eugene Germany — are no longer part of the program.

Brief impact breakdown...

Richards. Someone else has to join the kick coverage team.

Germany. Flashed considerable talent at defensive end a year ago and may have been a contributor. Probably not a huge impact, as I chalk Carr's bizarre claim that Adam Patterson and Brandon Graham were likely to "move inside" to excessive grumpiness. Was likely to be Tim Jamison to Jamison's Rondell Biggs this year. Hurts depth but with a couple guys with good potential behind the projected starters it shouldn't be a huge deal.

Butler. At least we know now why he couldn't get a snap count right last year: he's miraculously dumb. Two days after the contentious spring kickoff press conference in which he was one of the guys Carr said was "possible... maybe not probable" to return, he gets hammered on St. Patrick's Day and beats the hell out of some student. From the Daily:

One resident said that before the incident, he heard the victim ask someone in the hall if he could use an iron. The resident then didn't see the victim for less than seven minutes.

When the victim returned, blood covered the side of his face and he was having difficulty talking, the resident said.

Why did this happen? Because Chris Richards thought the student was a different guy who was "talking crap" in class:

The student, Walter Myers, told The News on Wednesday that he went to a friend's room to borrow an iron when another person in the room - whom he later identified as Richards - accused him of "talking crap'' in a class.

"I don't know who you are,'' Myers said he told Richards. "I don't know why you're bothering me.''

Richards then punched him, Myers said, before another person in the room joined the beating.

(I'll further note here that the Ann Arbor News had the most comprehensive and interesting article on the galaxy-spanning stupidity going on here, which makes them 2/2 in major UM stories over the past couple weeks after they blew up everyone except Rosenberg about the basketball coaching situation.)

So, yeah, you're gone, and for such a good reason. You don't come into the WQ lookin' for no iron! I'm about to get in an elevator, wait for five minutes when I could have easily taken the stairs, and then furiously swipe my MCard in the door for another five minutes to get into that stuff!

Ah. Anyway. Butler's loss is a definite blow as opposed to Richards (who?) and Germany (possible blow). Though Mike Massey was nominally #1 on the depth chart in the absence of Tyler Ecker -- what is with Michigan and remarkably dumb tight ends? PITCH IT TO BREASTON aaaaargh -- it was Butler who looked a future star. Last year Michigan's new zone running game featured a ton of two-tight end sets that seem infeasible now that the choices past Massey are Chris McLaurin, a guy who moved to tight end because a shoulder injury made OLB unfeasible, Andre Criswell*, a last-second two-star recruit who was a fullback until this spring, and two freshmen, one of whom is currently a 215 pound wide receiver. Will we see more fullback sets? Michigan has one fullback on the roster with the early departure of Will Paul and the move of Criswell, and that's true freshman Vince Helmuth. Michigan's critically short of guys for jumbo sets.

I will note that Ohio State's offense managed to scrape by this year with something called a Rory Nichol at tight end after they lost their own dunderheaded TE, Marcel Frost. With a plethora of receiving targets available -- come on, Arrington, let's get it together -- the actual negative effect on the offense is yet to be seen. I am leery about the possibility that our third-and-short conversions get even worse next year.

*(It's deeply ironic that Michigan picked up Criswell mostly because they had an extra scholarship slot available and gave it to a program guy with impeccable work ethic and character who they had discovered because he was a high school teammate of Butler. The irony reaches mindblowing levels if Criswell takes Butler's job because of it; should he end up an All-American, thousands of reformed Gen-X slackers will have their heads retroactively explode in 1992.)

What about Adrian Arrington?

Still hanging on. Apparently attended this week's press conference. Not in the habit of kicking the shit out of random civilians.

Ripple effect?

I wonder if this will result in an offensive lineman moving out to TE. A few classes ago Michigan brought in two tight ends with the intention of moving them to the offensive line. Mark Ortmann has established himself as a contender for the right tackle spot and is likely to valuable to move, but Tim MacAvoy seems buried in the interior. If we need a guy to come in on third and one to plow someone he might be our best option, though he's likely to be too clunky for regular deployment.

Germany Gone(?)

The Detroit News recaps the recent shenanigans within the program; mostly stuff you've heard before except for this bit:

And backup defensive end Eugene Germany was ticketed for marijuana possession in Ann Arbor on Feb. 12, according to court records. But Germany, who admitted responsibility and paid a $50 fine, recently was granted a release from his scholarship so he can transfer.

With the assumed dismissal of Butler, that would bring us to two of the three bad actors called out in the spring press conference already gone; now we're just waiting on Arrington's fate. Dude: you're from Iowa. Let's get some sensibility up in this place. You can either return to the land of cows and corn or play in the NFL. This is not a hard decision.

Gracias to commenter RossMBA, who pointed out that my assertion about the unimportance of the Germany possession charge was really wrong here.

Today Is The Best Day Ever

Eugene Germany ticketed for weed:

University of Michigan defensive end Eugene Germany was ticketed for marijuana possession last month, according to 15th District Court records. Germany admitted responsibility and paid a $50 fine on Feb. 20 at the court in Ann Arbor.

Impact: minimal. This is probably the reason he's being held out of spring practice and is already factored into his tenuous status.

Say Goodbye To Carson Butler

...and probably Chris Richards, who is apparently named "Christian." He's not acting very Christian these days. From MLive:

Two University of Michigan football players are accused of attacking a fellow student in the West Quad residence hall for no apparent reason on St. Patrick's Day.

Carson Butler, 19, and Christian Richards III, 19, were arraigned today in 15th District Court on one count of aggravated assault and one count of assault and battery each. They were released on $5,000 personal bond and have a pre-trial hearing March 27.

Richards had some unreported legal issues earlier this year:

In addition to the charges stemming from Saturday's incident, Richards has another case pending. He was charged with illegal entry on campus last year. Richards failed to appear for his arraignment on that charge, and a bench warrant had been issued for his arrest.

With Butler already hanging by a thread -- he was one of the three who were "possibly... maybe not probably" going to get back this year -- this has to end his career at Michigan. Richards is probably also going to get the hook, what with the breaking and entering and skipping out on arraignment and then beating the crap out of a random student. Scholarship count for '08 now at 15.

Update: hey, these are our first Fulmer Cup points ever. Too bad it's not something innocuous like speeding tickets and will actually cost is a potential starter.