What Orson Said

(And what he said: recruiting is creepy.)

Approximate timeline of my yesterday:

• 12-1ish AM: post Orson Swindle Award Bukkake Part I.
• Sometime in the night: Internets go away.
• Sometime later, say ten-ish: recruiting hell breaks loose. Five star cornerback Ronald Johnson, a critical, OMG Shirtless recruit if there ever was one, reportedly drops Michigan. Panic, chaos ensue.
• Yet later (I said this was approximate): someone starts forwarding a creepy email around purporting to be inside information on the exact circumstances of the drop. It levels Lebron's mom-type accusations at the Official Mom of Rojo and implies that shady doesn't begin to cover said circumstances. None of it will ever be proven true; all of it will filter into Michigan recruiting lore. The ghost stories hardcore recruitniks tell each other when they like to simulate misery now include Ronald Johnson's mom.
• 6:30-ish. Online, I survey the carnage. Someone's sent me an email declaring it to be a "kick in the nuts." What? Wait? He? I quickly pass through the first few stages of Kubler-Ross -- it can't be true I GON KILL SOMEONE what if we offer his brother I GON KILL ME -- before settling on a Michigan-football-localized depression.

End result: Ronald Johnson, a guy who has never said anything more definitive than "Michigan is in my top five," is trashed by jilted nuts. His mom, assuming this all turns out like it looks like it's going to, is going to be Public Enemy Number One for a certain subsection of Michigan fandom because one guy sent a somewhat convincing but very, very unverified email. I'm looking for puppies to kick (unless they can play cornerback, in which case it's "red rocket" time).

Recruiting, ladies and gentlemen! I hate it and will never fall for this stuff ag--

BLOOMINGTON, Ind. -- First he committed to Michigan. Then he changed his mind and decided to go to Indiana. Now Warren Central standout Jerimy Finch, the top-rated high school football player in Indiana, said it's a two-horse race. Finch, who made an unofficial visit to the University of Florida last weekend, said Wednesday night he has not decided if he will attend Indiana or Michigan.

C'mon Jerimy! You, your badass safety skills, and your complete inability to understand the words "verbal commitment" would be a perfect fit at Michigan. You would start last season! I'll tutor you! Charles Woodson won the Heisman and so can you!

So, yeah, recruiting is creepy. But so am I, evidently. The latest:

Ronald Johnson still seems to be out. There will undoubtedly be many conflicting rumors in the next few days (he plans to announce Sunday) and I'll try to parse them to offer up some general idea of where he's going, but at this point he seems like a vast longshot.

The Donovan Warren bull market is receding and USC again appears to be the likely destination. The rumored unofficial to Michigan that was supposed to happen a few days ago did not come off. While the mere possibility it would happen implies that Michigan is under serious consideration, it also implies that there needed to be a little extra push to convince the young man and that won't be happening now.

Jerimy Finch is momentarily considering Michigan. Previous statements from Finch:

• I'm 100% committed to Michigan
• I'm 100% committed to Indiana.
• It's 50-50 between Indiana and Florida.
• It's 50-50 between Indiana and Michigan.

Schroedinger's recruit. Open the box on signing day.

Rashad Mason did not make a trip to Clemson and is considering Ole Miss, Kentucky, North Carolina, and Michigan. Michigan clobberates those schools but good in recent on-field success, but the rest are closer to his Tennessee home -- Mason's expressed a desire to get out of Tennessee and "experience new things," but how new are we talking here? -- and can presumably offer more immediate access to playing time behind guys who aren't Mario Manningham and Adrian Arrington. Has never named a leader. So, like, I dunno. Think we're better than 25% but worse than 40%.