Unverified Voracity: Gazongas(!) Edition

Vorified. You know this already. English to DC:

Ron English is the Wolverines' new defensive coordinator, a school source confirmed.

You don't know, or like, this paragraph:

Herrmann's future has not yet been decided. He could still remain at Michigan, possibly as special teams coordinator, which DeBord has handled the last two seasons since returning to Michigan after being Central Michigan's coach for four years.

No offense to Herrmann, but I'd be creeped out if English was looking over his shoulder at him when attempting to forge a steely-eyed asskicking defense. Still, this makes last week's nattering nabob of negativism explosion look silly in retrospect ("NNN" HT: Spiro T. Agnew(!)).

Le sigh. Right. Basketball team has flitted earthward once more. Reaction from RBUAS and NKOTB Maize n Brew. Wonk says that the dang-diddly-ang three point marksmanship being displayed by Michigan opponents is...

...almost exactly equal measures of both [bad luck and bad defense]. Ohio State has played worse defenses than Michigan's and not shot as well as they did last night. That much is luck. Still, the Wolverines do indeed have some defensive liabilities. Screens, to pick one mundane example, seem to work about 50 percent better against Michigan than what is normal, particularly against non-Graham Brown Wolverines. Much of the first-half damage from long range was done on simple ball screens. Daniel Horton (who got the rare points-assists dub-dub last night with a 15-10), Dion Harris, Chris Hunter--all struggled with screens. (Horton was also too eager to sag on the weak side last night and was burned on a nice skip pass to Foster from Sylvester.)

Personally I didn't think all that poorly of the perimeter defense, but I defer to the infinitely more qualified to answer Wonk on this matter.

Grant Bowman's back in the boiler room, but his brief detour to the Steelers' practice squad got national attention, including a seven-minute interview on the Bob & Tom Show. Dangerous Logic captured the wild radio beast and set it down in data for your listening edification. Enjoy.

Must be something in the gumbo. From Gatorsports.com's Florida recruiting recap, DBs section:

ONE THAT GOT AWAY: Jai Eugene, the No. 1 cover corner in the nation, told Tebow the night before the Army All-American Game that he was committing to the Gators. He picked Michigan instead, then signed with LSU.

Jeez. I envision Eugene at a local McDonald's, paralyzed with indecision when asked if he wants to supersize: "Yes... no. Can I say Michigan? I can? LSU."

(HT: Feldblog($))

Chance of Sports Guy mocking this particular thing he doesn't understand: 100%. Boston College is going to play a hockey game at Fenway. Why I say thing about?

''We're going to do it," said a BC official yesterday. ''It's just a matter of finding an opponent and a date that will work. But we're going to play a game in Fenway."

The details will be worked out over the next several weeks, and they could include the Boston University team as part of a doubleheader. The original idea called for such a doubleheader, with BU and BC against teams from the Midwest, possibly Michigan and Michigan State.

This would be cool, and Red is generally up for wacky things and tough opponents. Plus we might get a "Red Berenson face," which is him staring at you, wondering exactly how many fingers he would have to use to kill you, and settling on three. Maybe three and half because you're a wiry bastard.

There are three ways to be noticed on the Internet.

1. Work very hard to create something interesting and valuable.
2. Say something dumb.
3. Display gazongas. (Recommended)
   

If you don't know about the gazonga-displaying Cowgirl Jen, um, well... you fail at the Internet. Please turn in your computer and report to 1952.

I mention this because apparently Jen is getting an advice column at SI on Campus:

Do you need some relationship advice? Having a problem with a friend? Want to know what really goes through a girl's mind. Email Jenn at feedback@sioncampus.com and she'll do her best to answer your questions in her weekly "Dear Cowgirl" column which will debut next week.

I forsee some poor intern at SI dealing with a lot of stuff like this:

Will you sleep with me?

-Joey, New York

Beleaguered SI Intern: No. Love, Jen!

Will you sleep with me?

-Paul W, Atlanta

Beleaguered SI Intern: No. Love, Jen!

I WOULDNT MIND COWING YOU'RE GIRL IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. IF YOU DONT IT MEANS SEX. WITH ME.

-Brian, Ann Arbor

Beleaguered SI Intern: I have no idea what you mean. You should seek help. Love, Jen!

How about now?

-Joey, New York

Beleaguered SI Intern: No. Love, Jen!

I HAVE A BLOG DOES THAT MAKE YOU HOT

-Brian, Ann Arbor

Beleaguered SI Intern: Please stop emailing me.